Predictability...routine...dealing in the absolute...these are seriously cherished attributes in the lives of my little men. Alex a little more so than Tanner, as was evidenced earlier today. Uncle Brian had the great idea of taking an empty box, cutting it open, and making a ramp for the boys toy cars. A box. A pair of scissors. Did you guess disaster? Probably not, because we didn't. As Brian made his first cuts into the very predictable shape of a box, Alex stood by wide-eyed and on edge. When Brian proceeded to open the box, Alex totally lost it. The box was broken. Order was lost...chaos insued. The defining quality of a box is it's boxy shape. To flatten a box is to completely overule logic and the absolute. Result - complete meltdown - uncontrollable crying - many 'Oh no!' exclaimations. The easy and logical answer - and the key word here is 'answer' - was to just get another box from the basement. So my sappy quote from the right comes into play - we gave him the answer - rather than forcing him to solve the problem. Alex needs to learn to restore order and predictability in his world, so tomorrow the boys and I are going to consider how to fix the box. My guess is that it will include lots of tape and glue and coaxing. As long as we're making that mess, we'll probably also haul out paint and pom-poms and make a big art event of it. Ahh...the simplicity, joy and anxiety...over folded cardboard!
2 comments:
Your quote is right on -- it's so easy for us, as parents, to just fix things, to provide answers and solutions instead of challenging our kids to work out solutions for themselves. I will try to keep this bit of wisdom in mind.
Since I have no young'uns yet and I teach older students I forgot that so much is new and different things happen everyday. I also forget that the boys need to have that predictability. I know that I am going to learn so much from your experiences. Thanks for starting your blog!
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